The Vegetarian Gazette

Cabbages seen on the Vegetarian Gazette

Plant-Based Food For Carbon-Based Units

How to Trick Your Tongue Behind Its Back 

Hillstone/Houston's vegeburger

If you really want to be a vegetarian but simply cannot imagine going without your fave rave freak-out foods, trick your tongue with equivalent dishes so you won't feel deprived.  Worry about living on the dreaded edamame and broccoli juice another day.


Very, very BAD: Veal cutlet parmigiana

EXCELLENT: Eggplant parmigiana


GOOD: Breaded mushrooms, zucchini, mozzarella sticks

BAD: Burger, rare and charcoal-grilled 

WONDERFUL: Hillstone's vegeburger, charcoal-grilled 

 BAD: Fried onion rings

GREAT: Fried onion rings

Most of the foods we love are all about the breading, the spices, the onions, the sauces, the gravies, weird little ingredients, the grill.

That's why we adore Morningstar Farms frozen meatless products—  the spicing in their little breakfast sausages is amazingly accurate, truly delicious — and no pork! I'm afraid their popular C'hikn products taste uncannily like the real stuff —  I can't eat them. Wish they'd bring back their ham slices, though — great over a campfire with a slice of canned pineapple. So who needs kale? 
Tips and tricks
Part of being civilized is being flexible. You may have to meet biz contacts in diners, or travel in parts of the world where your vegetarian options are limited.  

That's why I pack a box or two of spaghetti and a couple of garlic bulbs just in case. This trick saved me in exotic Tetiaroa,  Marlon Brando's private island in Tahiti, where there was nada to eat but a lavish all-seafood buffet. Who doesn't know how to make spaghetti with garlic and oil? I handed it over to the kitchen and fifteen minutes later, problem solved.